A song I wrote about Paris Hilton to the tune of Cruella De Vil for governament class

For my government class, we had to write a "creative" version of the Declaration of Independence, following its structure and philosophical ideas (Locke, Rousseau, and Montesquieu!!!) but with some clever subject, like the kid last year the teacher won't shut up about who declared himself independent from wearing underwear, "the cotton tyrants of man". So, I did Paris Hilton's dogs declaring their independence from her to the tune of "Cruella De Vil". I figured I'd post it here, so someone who cares can read it. :)

(Oh, and sorry the verses aren't as... separate as they could be. I'm too lazy to adjust it for the Internet. But, I know it makes reading it more difficult.)

Declaration of Independence

To Paris Hilton from her Dogs

(to the tune of “Cruella De Vil” from 101 Dalmatians)

Oh Paris Hilton

Oh Paris Hilton

It’s time for you to hear

Our Declaration

We want to just be dogs

And go have fun

Oh Paris, dear Paris Hilton

We know you have issues

But listen to ours

We believe in

Separation of Powers

We need two equal branches, not just one! (Montesquieu)

Oh Paris, please Paris Hilton

That civil liberty’s

A thing we don’t have (Rousseau)

How can we be free

Inside a Gucchi bag?

We ought to form a state or sovereign (Rousseau)

Oh Paris, oh Paris Hilton

We feel that your society’s

Not civil

You’re just living in Nature’s perfect state (Locke)

We’ve come to realize

You’re not the owner we once liked

You’re an absolute monarch

Who dictates! (Locke)

We think that you need

Some balances and checks

To limit your power

Like Montesquieu said (Montesquieu)

This mansion could be so

Democratically run

Except for Paris, that Paris Hilton

FOR thinking that we’d like

To go to the beach

Then sticking us in these

Doggie bikinis

FOR subjecting us to this

Humiliation

Oh Paris, oh Paris Hilton

SHE has dragged us to all these stupid parties

And walked us with a handbag, not a leash

SHE has made us quarter

Nicole Richie’s Pomeranians on her orders

When she and Nicole were in times in peace!

SHE has made us wear little

Pink doggie sweaters

But we think that we are

Able to do better

We are declaring our independence!

Oh Paris, dear Paris Hilton

Understand that we don’t hate all you humans

The guy who brings us food is rather nice

We feel like four-legged brothers

To all you others

It’s just Paris who’s ruining our life

Oh Paris Hilton

Oh Paris Hilton

We’re independent

From you and everyone

So don’t try to stop us

From having canine fun

Oh Paris, dear Paris Hilton